I am 21 years old and have been dating a man who is 23 for
about a month. Every time I go out with my friends he gets mad and asks why they are
so much more important than he is. He makes me feel bad about it and all it does is
stress me out. He does not like my friends and says they are "too
possessive" of me, yet I am with him all the time! He always tries to make me
have sex with him and when I tell him no he says it's because I don't care about him and
that if I cared about him then I would give him what he wanted.
He says he's going to marry me because I'm what he wants and
so he wants me to have sex with him to show I'll never leave. The other night I
didn't want to go with him to his mom's house (he had to drop some things off) so he
called and told me he was f&*@# pissed at me. He called
me a f%c*#^ b(t*@ and said he never wanted to see my face again or talk to me again (with
a lot more curse words put in there).
Later he called and called but my friend answered every time.
He said the only reason I wouldn't talk to him was because she was putting sh*t in
my head. We've only been dating for about a month. Today he called and said he
was so sorry for yelling at me and can't believe he did it and wants to see me later.
What do I do?? He gives me everything and spoils me profusely. I have
tons of fun with him but I hate all this! Please help,
Puzzled
Dear Puzzled:
You have tons of fun with him? That can't possibly outweigh
this abuse. His idea of love is very different from yours - it allows him to own you and
treat you like junk. If you stay with him, I can practically guarantee that it will get
worse. Get out now, don't feel sorry for him, don't try to make him understand, don't hope
he'll change, just move on. You'll be lucky if he just 'lets' you go.
God Bless
